16 Comments
User's avatar
HVR - James's avatar

Ummmmmmmmmmmmm. I feel called out. I feel uncomfortable. Are you in my mind? It's too real...

Jordan Elings's avatar

Bold and confrontational, forcing one to self reflect on uncomfortable truths. Well done.

Brooklyn Crane's avatar

Thanks, Jordan. It’s important that we call it out for what it is sometimes.

Gary L Taylor's avatar

Some really nice lines within that. I enjoyed it a lot.

Brooklyn Crane's avatar

Thank you so much for reading, Gary! It was fun writing it with the tail rhymes in between.

Steven Kent's avatar

Very interesting. Based on a true story, as the saying goes? I was about to say that your observations here are penetrating, but based on the subject matter, that seemed wrong ;-)

Brooklyn Crane's avatar

STEVEN! 😭 Stroke of genius, one might say.

Steven Kent's avatar

So many potential jokes here . . . .

Brooklyn Crane's avatar

Have at it. Write an entire poem, even! 🤸🏻‍♂️

Steven Kent's avatar

About a burning bush? 😉

Brooklyn Crane's avatar

Careful now! Or will end up publicly executed!

Kristina Ray's avatar

Wow, this is just brilliant, Brooklyn! 👏👏👏

Kelly Trost's avatar

"repress,

and deny in shame while dying to

confess."

Hi Brooklyn, it feels to me like the thematic material of the entire poem is recapitalized very clearly in these final three lines. The entire poem is, of course, brilliant. (Sorry, not articulating well at the moment.)

eLOVEution's avatar

In my heart there is no sin, for everything is an expression of the state within. Oodles of love to you as you always create from your heart. xo

Jamal Robinson's avatar

These lines 👏🏽

“What you two have done behind the stall

will mess

with your song and worship in the hall.“

User's avatar
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Brooklyn Crane's avatar

Thank you so much for reading! The duality of religious guilt is a fascinating subject to me. 🙏🏻😔