I have been depressed like this at times, and in other ways at other times, and although this is one of the more ultimately tolerable shapes for depression to hold, it is also one of the strangest. It reminds me a bit of what Schopenhauer called "necessary withdrawal from society" although, as you point out in the poem itself, it is more commonly experienced nowadays during periods that feel like stagnation rather than growth, and can easily become a prison of inertia.
There's always more to say about a work like this, so I won't try to say any more. It's an incredible accomplishment!
Oh, I agree! This is the “cleanest” form of depression. I’ve posted poems alluding to its other shapes before, but this one is the most deeply and intimately known to me. Going somewhere dark by going nowhere at all.
If it’s of your interest at all, I wrote this poem while listening to Suuvi’s Memoria Vitae. It might provide an atmosphere and another layer to its composition.
Your poem gives me insight into the internal experience of depression, which helps me better understand the emotional and cognitive challenges faced by the children I work with. This understanding strengthens my ability to respond with appropriate support, validation, and therapeutic engagement (though I am not a therapist). Thanks.
This is such an encouragement to keep writing on this subject and those related to it. Thank you so much for your words and for sharing this small piece of your life with me. Much appreciated!
Wow… this really reminded me of my own depression.
For a very long time, I didn’t even have the desire to change. I wanted to wrap that cloak of darkness around me and simply disappear. But when I finally started to see the light, when I wanted to step out from under that blanket, it felt exactly like the unmoving water you describe. It kept pulling me back. Climbing out of it was a fight. Hard… but worth every ounce of effort.
Thank you for putting words to a place so many of us know.
Your words are so powerfully poetic it’s mesmerising, my eyes roam the hills of your lines and my thoughts waltz with the rhythm of your words. Hauntingly beautiful, thank you for sharing this with us💌💗
What you mention here is both true and beautiful, yes, if only when it is not overwhelming. Stillness, when unrelenting, ravages through you until it’s hollowed you out, until all you have is powerlessness and inescapable motionlessness.
To many, calm is a gift, yet to many others, calm is stagnation, numbness, and self-grief. To me, this is what depression is, what this poem is about—the ever-sundering weight of going nowhere, of trying by not trying, of feeling guilty yet worthy of never moving at all.
I appreciate your words and your article. Thank you so much for reading and sharing! ❤️
Your next poem should contemplate the mysteries of the removed comment that has already elicited one or more great replies, from the perspective of one who has never seen it.
Only a master such as yourself could do the subject justice! 😁
Dude, I have no idea what that was about, but from what I wrote here, I proooobably got someone saying that unrelenting stillness was a beautiful state of meditation, and I prooooobably didn’t like that back then, lol.
I wonder if it’s the word unrelenting that’s the key? Calm in meditation is something you can step out to answer the door or if the power goes out or if anything.. the point about unrelenting is that’s there’s a sense of coercion.. the ability to change state isn’t within the experiencer’s awareness or from that place may not exist at all…
Yes! It's, as you say, a prison sort of state, just like infinite ecstasy would rob anyone from fully experiencing life. Thank you for your input, Vivien!
Feeling a little demented myself sometimes.
It’s a part of this experience we call life, they say.
Oh, Brooklyn, this is so beautifully mournful, yearning, poignant. I've read a lot of poems today and this one is tops for the day.
Aw, Kelly. 🥲 This poem is very special to me, and it gladdens me deeply that you say that. Thank you so much for reading by.
I as well love it. This part spoke to me “Some would find a paradise to bless
in such a state of self-immersion,
but, despite remaining motionless,
it’s not at all a meditation—“
Thank you so much for reading, Dorie! That’s one of my favorite parts as well! 🙏🏻❤️
Ohhhh i love this 😀
Thank youuuu! ❤️❤️
Awesome poem, Brooklyn! *restacked and noted*
I have been depressed like this at times, and in other ways at other times, and although this is one of the more ultimately tolerable shapes for depression to hold, it is also one of the strangest. It reminds me a bit of what Schopenhauer called "necessary withdrawal from society" although, as you point out in the poem itself, it is more commonly experienced nowadays during periods that feel like stagnation rather than growth, and can easily become a prison of inertia.
There's always more to say about a work like this, so I won't try to say any more. It's an incredible accomplishment!
Oh, I agree! This is the “cleanest” form of depression. I’ve posted poems alluding to its other shapes before, but this one is the most deeply and intimately known to me. Going somewhere dark by going nowhere at all.
If it’s of your interest at all, I wrote this poem while listening to Suuvi’s Memoria Vitae. It might provide an atmosphere and another layer to its composition.
It's an awesome song! I don't think YouTube allows anything to be played on repeat, so I'll have to get my hands on an MP3 of it.
More than worth it! The entire album follows the same vibe.
Stunning stuff, thanks
Thank you so much for reading!
Your poem gives me insight into the internal experience of depression, which helps me better understand the emotional and cognitive challenges faced by the children I work with. This understanding strengthens my ability to respond with appropriate support, validation, and therapeutic engagement (though I am not a therapist). Thanks.
This is such an encouragement to keep writing on this subject and those related to it. Thank you so much for your words and for sharing this small piece of your life with me. Much appreciated!
I feel your fight for flight within in your cubicle.😗
Hahaha, yeah. It fits a 9-5 situation perfectly, doesn’t it?
Mmm Thank you.
For what? 😮
It felt like an honest story late at night Brooklyn.
Wow… this really reminded me of my own depression.
For a very long time, I didn’t even have the desire to change. I wanted to wrap that cloak of darkness around me and simply disappear. But when I finally started to see the light, when I wanted to step out from under that blanket, it felt exactly like the unmoving water you describe. It kept pulling me back. Climbing out of it was a fight. Hard… but worth every ounce of effort.
Thank you for putting words to a place so many of us know.
Consciousness, switched on and going nowhere.
A body present only as a failed instruction.
Time loops, but never advances.
Even hope arrives and stalls.
Stillness isn’t peace.
It’s the system refusing to respond.
Your words are so powerfully poetic it’s mesmerising, my eyes roam the hills of your lines and my thoughts waltz with the rhythm of your words. Hauntingly beautiful, thank you for sharing this with us💌💗
What you mention here is both true and beautiful, yes, if only when it is not overwhelming. Stillness, when unrelenting, ravages through you until it’s hollowed you out, until all you have is powerlessness and inescapable motionlessness.
To many, calm is a gift, yet to many others, calm is stagnation, numbness, and self-grief. To me, this is what depression is, what this poem is about—the ever-sundering weight of going nowhere, of trying by not trying, of feeling guilty yet worthy of never moving at all.
I appreciate your words and your article. Thank you so much for reading and sharing! ❤️
Your next poem should contemplate the mysteries of the removed comment that has already elicited one or more great replies, from the perspective of one who has never seen it.
Only a master such as yourself could do the subject justice! 😁
Dude, I have no idea what that was about, but from what I wrote here, I proooobably got someone saying that unrelenting stillness was a beautiful state of meditation, and I prooooobably didn’t like that back then, lol.
I wonder if it’s the word unrelenting that’s the key? Calm in meditation is something you can step out to answer the door or if the power goes out or if anything.. the point about unrelenting is that’s there’s a sense of coercion.. the ability to change state isn’t within the experiencer’s awareness or from that place may not exist at all…
Yes! It's, as you say, a prison sort of state, just like infinite ecstasy would rob anyone from fully experiencing life. Thank you for your input, Vivien!
I mean... you admit in the poem that it can be beautiful, under the right circumstances. Maybe whoever left the comment didn't get that far? 😂
But isn’t that midway through the poem? 😭 Weeeell… They’re gone anyway.
They got hit with the eternal banhammer, for fake-reading posts and commenting on them. 😶